Lordy I am not into Mondays.
WTF is Star Reynolds doing on House Hunters?!
Sorry...that just threw me for a loop. So anyhow...Mondays. Bleh. Suckage. Pissy. Dropped Kidlet off at school and then got to enjoy a fabulous commute populated with dill wads who have completely forgotten how to drive in rain. And they chose to decompensate in front of me. Joy!
And then ...work.
Gotta win the lottery. Gotta buy a ticket first. Yeah.
Hit the store on my way home from work and then got home and decided I wanted fried eggs and toast for dinner. So that is what I had. Watched Weeds as it was conveniently on at 7 (?!) tonight. That is a perk of having like 10 Showtime channels available! Season 3 is pretty darn good so far. Even the Olson twin is pretty good. And so far Season 2 of Dexter is kicking major ass. Dexter is easily my favorite show on TV. It just squeaks out Weeds. I am actually digging the plot device on Weeds that added Peter's ex wife. At first I was sceptical. But the mammogram scene won me over. And Dexter's addiction problem? Awesome! I was wondering what the plan would be on Dexter as they used the first two books for Season 1 and the third book was not out yet. So far, their original plots have been great. Showtime is, hands down, the best television out there.
Kidlet and I are reading Anne Rice's Witching Hour and doing a book club. It's kinda fun to get her take on things. Of course we have to stop reading and go look stuff up when we are unclear on the the history of something. Like Electroencephalograms.
Yes we are weird.
Showing posts with label weirdness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label weirdness. Show all posts
Monday, October 15, 2007
Friday, August 24, 2007
I Like Having A Detachable Penis
It was a bad week for members everywhere. Frankly after seeing the following headlines and subsequent stories, if *I* had a penis I would wish it were detachable too. I'd be putting it in a safety deposit box. There is a bad moon on the rise and it has it's eye on penii of the world.
(Note to RWA - Nope I don't think "penii" is in the dictionary either. Like "pubtastic" it falls under the category of Starr fauxcabulary!)
British dwarf's penis gets stuck to hoover
Mon Aug 20, 3:50 PM ET
EDINBURGH (AFP) - A dwarf performer at the Edinburgh fringe festival had to be rushed to hospital after his penis got stuck to a vacuum cleaner during an act that went horribly awry.
Daniel Blackner, or "Captain Dan the Demon Dwarf", was due to perform at the Circus of Horrors at the festival known for its oddball, offbeat performances. The main part of his act saw him appear on stage with a vacuum cleaner attached to his member through a special attachment.
The attachment broke before the performance and Blackner tried to fix it using extra-strong glue, but unfortunately only let it dry for 20 seconds instead of the 20 minutes required. He then joined it directly to his organ. The end result? A solid attachment, laughter, mortification and ... hospitalisation.
"It was the most embarrassing moment of my life when I got wheeled into a packed AE with a vacuum attached to me," Blackner said. "I just wished the ground could swallow me up. Luckily, they saw me quickly so the embarrassment was short-lived."
Talk about the blow job from hell!
This next one is a true "WTF?!?!" moment.
Russian woman sets fire to ex-husband's penis
MOSCOW (Reuters) - A woman set fire to her ex-husband's penis as he sat naked watching television and drinking vodka, Moscow police said on Wednesday.
Asked if the man would make a full recovery, a police spokeswoman said it was "difficult to predict".
The attack climaxed three years of acrimonious enforced co-habitation. The couple divorced three years ago but continued to share a small flat, something common in Russia where property costs are very high.
"It was monstrously painful," the wounded ex-husband told Tvoi Den newspaper. "I was burning like a torch. I don't know what I did to deserve this."
If there was ever proof that communism was a botched experiment there you have it. Any system that leaves a country so screwed a good 10 years after it's demise that ex's have to co-habitat is truly and completely a failure.
Appointments right and left today. About to wake up Kidlet for her hair appointment. She is seeing Christopher at Ziva salon today for a cut and some kinds of color. Possible blue streaks instead of pink or possible all over auburn while she grows it out. I am just there to write the check =)
Then we have school shopping, cat issues, and guitar lessons. This is what I call a "day off" in my world. Um, yeah.
At least it is sunny. I know it has to be hard for you all to believe what with the rest of the country baking and all, but July and August have been SHITTY here in the PAC NW. More rainy than usual by a long shot and many many many MANY totally gray days with temps barely hitting high 60's. What the fuck?! I live in shit gray weather from Mid October to May. That sucks bad enough without having July and August look like frickin November. My canna lily has yet to bloom and it is nearly September! Oh and I like humidity. So spare me the at least you are lucky blah blah blah. Up and down temps/barometric pressure plays havoc with my arthritis :P
Grr.
Ok got more coffee.
Tiny (hah) child is stirring. More like glaring at me from the confines of her comforter which she has wrapped herself in like a burrito. I am trying to drag her ass out of bed in time to make it to Kornblatts for bagels. We shall see. Although I need to get my ass in gear as well.
With that, I bid you all adieu!
(Note to RWA - Nope I don't think "penii" is in the dictionary either. Like "pubtastic" it falls under the category of Starr fauxcabulary!)
British dwarf's penis gets stuck to hoover
Mon Aug 20, 3:50 PM ET
EDINBURGH (AFP) - A dwarf performer at the Edinburgh fringe festival had to be rushed to hospital after his penis got stuck to a vacuum cleaner during an act that went horribly awry.
Daniel Blackner, or "Captain Dan the Demon Dwarf", was due to perform at the Circus of Horrors at the festival known for its oddball, offbeat performances. The main part of his act saw him appear on stage with a vacuum cleaner attached to his member through a special attachment.
The attachment broke before the performance and Blackner tried to fix it using extra-strong glue, but unfortunately only let it dry for 20 seconds instead of the 20 minutes required. He then joined it directly to his organ. The end result? A solid attachment, laughter, mortification and ... hospitalisation.
"It was the most embarrassing moment of my life when I got wheeled into a packed AE with a vacuum attached to me," Blackner said. "I just wished the ground could swallow me up. Luckily, they saw me quickly so the embarrassment was short-lived."
Talk about the blow job from hell!
This next one is a true "WTF?!?!" moment.
Russian woman sets fire to ex-husband's penis
MOSCOW (Reuters) - A woman set fire to her ex-husband's penis as he sat naked watching television and drinking vodka, Moscow police said on Wednesday.
Asked if the man would make a full recovery, a police spokeswoman said it was "difficult to predict".
The attack climaxed three years of acrimonious enforced co-habitation. The couple divorced three years ago but continued to share a small flat, something common in Russia where property costs are very high.
"It was monstrously painful," the wounded ex-husband told Tvoi Den newspaper. "I was burning like a torch. I don't know what I did to deserve this."
If there was ever proof that communism was a botched experiment there you have it. Any system that leaves a country so screwed a good 10 years after it's demise that ex's have to co-habitat is truly and completely a failure.
Appointments right and left today. About to wake up Kidlet for her hair appointment. She is seeing Christopher at Ziva salon today for a cut and some kinds of color. Possible blue streaks instead of pink or possible all over auburn while she grows it out. I am just there to write the check =)
Then we have school shopping, cat issues, and guitar lessons. This is what I call a "day off" in my world. Um, yeah.
At least it is sunny. I know it has to be hard for you all to believe what with the rest of the country baking and all, but July and August have been SHITTY here in the PAC NW. More rainy than usual by a long shot and many many many MANY totally gray days with temps barely hitting high 60's. What the fuck?! I live in shit gray weather from Mid October to May. That sucks bad enough without having July and August look like frickin November. My canna lily has yet to bloom and it is nearly September! Oh and I like humidity. So spare me the at least you are lucky blah blah blah. Up and down temps/barometric pressure plays havoc with my arthritis :P
Grr.
Ok got more coffee.
Tiny (hah) child is stirring. More like glaring at me from the confines of her comforter which she has wrapped herself in like a burrito. I am trying to drag her ass out of bed in time to make it to Kornblatts for bagels. We shall see. Although I need to get my ass in gear as well.
With that, I bid you all adieu!
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
Is That You Baby Or Just A Brilliant Disguise
Well it took my 45 minutes to get here but I made it. At 6:30 am. Joyness. First thing I did was make java. I actually brought half and half for a change so I am looking forward to thawing out.
It has decided to snow here in the Pac NW. First it had to lay down a nice coating of freezing rain. Cause pretty dry, drivable snow is just not done here. School is closed for small child since we don't actually live in Portland proper. Apparently the Portland schools closed last week on a day that had minor ice and took serious shit for it. So today, when it is SNOWING, they stay open. Sometimes it's good to live in the sticks.
I did get one nice surprise on arriving to work today. I am currently tied for first place over at Mimi's "I Can't Believe They're Not Married" contest. That is sarcasm people. I can totally believe these guys are not married. I don't even think Rosie Palm will have anything to do with them.
Doing testing on the new changes we loaded into our system. Which, in case you have been following my rantings, has been broken due to the MS network patches that GOD AND MAN use. It has, in fact, been issue ridden since Oct the 9th. That is like 15 weeks people. But, as I have posted before, we have a SWAT team on it.
Yayville.
It has decided to snow here in the Pac NW. First it had to lay down a nice coating of freezing rain. Cause pretty dry, drivable snow is just not done here. School is closed for small child since we don't actually live in Portland proper. Apparently the Portland schools closed last week on a day that had minor ice and took serious shit for it. So today, when it is SNOWING, they stay open. Sometimes it's good to live in the sticks.
I did get one nice surprise on arriving to work today. I am currently tied for first place over at Mimi's "I Can't Believe They're Not Married" contest. That is sarcasm people. I can totally believe these guys are not married. I don't even think Rosie Palm will have anything to do with them.
Doing testing on the new changes we loaded into our system. Which, in case you have been following my rantings, has been broken due to the MS network patches that GOD AND MAN use. It has, in fact, been issue ridden since Oct the 9th. That is like 15 weeks people. But, as I have posted before, we have a SWAT team on it.
Yayville.
Friday, November 24, 2006
Weirdness Is As Weirdness Does
Thanks to Parlancheq for giving me something to talk about. Or post about. Or cut and paste about. Whatever.
This one was a no brainer. Um, like duh. I am an Aquarian. I loved the question asking if you had ever been called "smart" and "crazy."
| Your Hair Should Be Orange |
 Expressive, deep, and one of a kind. You pull off "weird" well - hardly anyone notices. |
This one was a no brainer. Um, like duh. I am an Aquarian. I loved the question asking if you had ever been called "smart" and "crazy."
| You are 100% Aquarius |
 |
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